What is Psychological Abuse?
Simply put, psychological abuse is abuse that damages the psyche, or the mind. Psychological abuse happens when one person attempts to gain power and control over another(1), and can include:
- put-downs or derogatory comments
-
ridiculing or blaming
- witholding affection
-
spiteful inaction
-
isolation from family and friends
-
stalking or checking whereabouts
-
dominating decision making in the relationship
-
controlling the partner's money
-
threats(2)
One instance of yelling is not abuse. Everyone fights; everyone yells. Abuse is a campaign.
Abuse follows a pattern, or a cycle. It may not be present all the time. Part of the cycle is a 'honeymoon phase', a time when the abuser attempts to reconcile or 'make up' for his actions. But, in an abusive relationship, after the honeymoon phase the tension builds and the abuse begins again.
How Prevalent is Psychological Abuse?
Psychological Abuse affects more than 1.5 million American women a year.
Based on an exhaustive study of violence in the United States, The National Institute of Justice estimates that over 1.3 million women are assaulted annually(3) by an intimate partner. Over a lifetime, that’s one woman out of every five.
But experts agree that physical battering is usually the final stage in a violent relationship: Abuse becomes physical after the abuser is confident that the victim will not leave, in other words, after she has experienced some form of psychological abuse.
In "the first large clinical study…to provide estimates of psychological violence,"(4) published by the American Medical Association, researchers found that 88% of the women they surveyed who had been physically abused had also been psychologically abused.
When they screened for psychological abuse alone, they found an additional 13.6% of their study group had experienced psychological abuse--without physical violence. Applying a Venn diagram to their data clearly shows that compared to the women who experienced physical abuse 122% experienced psychological abuse.
In other words, psychological abuse happens to 22% more women than physical abuse. That's one woman out of every four.
How Harmful is Psychological Abuse?
Psychological abuse can cause serious harm. Studies show that the effects of psychological abuse can include depression, acute stress, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder(5) and ongoing physical problems(6).
In some cases, the abuse is so severe that it has been likened to the psychological abuse suffered by American POWs in Korea(7). (See Psychological Abuse and Biderman's Methods of Coercion.)
Psychological vs. Physical Abuse
The difference between physical and psychological abuse seems pretty clear: Physical abuse is slapping, pushing, choking and the like, while psychological abuse consists of threats, put-downs, acting jealous, isolating a partner or controlling the finances.
However, according to the National Domestic Violence Hotline’s website(8), physical abuse also includes some not so obvious actions: Throwing objects, damaging property, driving recklessly, putting a partner out of the home, abandoning them in a dangerous or unfamiliar place or preventing them from calling the police or seeking medical treatment.
Psychological Abuse and Biderman’s Methods of Coercion
In 1973, Amnesty International compiled all their past research to produce a Report on Torture. A researcher named Biderman spearheaded the effort to discover how the Chinese were able to brainwash Allied prisoners of war without the use of 'excessive force'. His theory on the psychological aspects of torture is applicable to domestic violence situations. Consider the following:
About Allied POWs in Korea:
"The victim is trapped in a situation in which the stresses are manipulated so as to constantly frustrate…the protection of basic self-identity." |
From a Victim of Psychological Abuse:
"I try to make him happy--I cook his dinners, keep the house clean and the baby quiet--but nothing is ever good enough. Maybe he’s right: Maybe there is something wrong with me." |
Biderman described the manipulative techniques employed by the Chinese interrogators in terms of Dependency, Debility and Dread (DDD). He concludes, "The combination of these three factors, carefully contrived and nurtured, prepares a resistant prisoner for complete compliance."(9)
If the proper application of DDD can make a trained soldier unable to resist the demands of his enemy, how effective it must be against an untrained civilian--especially when wielded by someone who claims to love her.
Furthermore, the methods used by the captors to control prisoners of war are so similar to the psychological abuse leveled against victims of domestic violence(10) that Biderman’s Chart of Coercion has been used to help educate women in battered women’s shelters. Consider the following similarities between the techniques Biderman documented and the questions frequently used screen potential victims of emotional abuse:
|
|
|
|
|
|
NDVH Screening Questions:
You may be in an emotionally abusive relationship if your partner: |
|
Biderman’s Coercive Techniques: |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Isolation - Deprives victim of all social support of his ability to resist |
|
Tries to isolate you from your family and friends; Does not want you to go to work |
|
|
|
|
|
Monopolization of perception - Eliminates stimuli competing with those controlled by captor; Frustrates all actions not consistent with compliance |
|
Monitors where you go, who you call and who you spend time with; Does not trust you and acts jealous or possessive |
|
|
|
|
|
Induced debility, Exhaustion - Weakens mental and physical ability to resist |
|
(Prevented you from calling police or seeking medical attention; forced you to leave your home - The NDVH classifies these as physical abuse) |
|
|
|
|
|
Threats - Cultivates anxiety and despair |
|
Threatens to hurt you, your children, your family or your pets |
|
|
|
|
|
Occasional indulgences - Provides positive motivation for compliance; Hinders adjustment to deprivation |
|
(Occur during the Honeymoon Phase in the Cycle of Violence, directly before the Tension-building Phase and the Acute Battering Incident)(11) |
|
|
|
|
|
Demonstrating ‘omnipotence’ - Suggests futility of resistance |
|
Controls finances or refuses to share money; Punishes you by withholding affection |
|
|
|
|
|
Degradation - Makes cost of resistance appear more damaging to self esteem than capitulation; Reduces prisoner to ‘animal level’ concerns |
|
Calls you names, insults you or continually criticizes you; Humiliates you in any way |
|
|
|
|
|
Enforcing trivial demands - Develops a habit of compliance |
|
Expects you to ask permission |
|
Six of the eight coercive techniques that Biderman documented directly parallel the statements used by the National Domestic Violence Hotline website for emotional--non-physical--abuse. Both of the other two--Induced debility, Exhaustion and Occasional indulgences--are also integral parts of psychological abuse (see notes in chart above).
Notes:
1 National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. The Problem. http://www.ncadv.org/TheProblem_100.html
2 O’Leary, K. Daniel (Ed.) and Maiuro, Roland D. (Ed.), Psychological Abuse in Violent Domestic Relations (pp.177-195). New York, New York, Springer Publishing Company, Inc.
3 Tjaden, Patricia and Thoennes, Nancy. Prevalence, Incidence, and Consequences of Violence Against Women: Findings From the National Violence Against Women Survey. The National Institute of Justice and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Research in Brief. NCJ 172837. November 1998. http://www.ncjrs.org/pdffiles/172837.pdf
5 Dutton, Mary A., Goodman, Lisa A., Bennett, Lauren. Court Involved Battered Women’s Responses to Violence: The Role of Psychological, Physical and Sexual Abuse. In O’Leary, K. Daniel (Ed.) and Maiuro, Roland D. (Ed.), Psychological Abuse in Violent Domestic Relations (pp.177-195). New York, New York, Springer Publishing Company, Inc.
7 Ann Jones. Next Time She’ll Be Dead: Battering and How to Stop It. Beacon Press, 2000
9 Amnesty International (1973) Report on Torture, Duckworth in association with Amnesty International Publications.
10 Saunders, Daniel G., Child Custody and Visitation Decisions in Domestic Violence Cases: Legal Trends, Research Findings, and Recommendations, University of Michigan, School of Social Work, Publication Date: August 1998, Revision Date: October 1998, available from http://www.vaw.umn.edu/documents/vawnet/custody/custody.html (accessed 6/14/2004)
|
